The freakin dark.
Unless you are well acquainted with one of these things my advice is to not do that. Ever. Wait until the next morning or maybe just get a husband that doesn't faff about stroking his beard and pondering things before actually just doing things.
I am a doer. I jump in and do things without considering whether what I'm doing is the right thing or not. Most of the time I'm right. Totally right. Very rarely wrong...
Andre is a thinker. He considers things from every angle and talks about it at length. I'm surprised our marriage has survived such differences but then again we only notice them when we're camping or renovating. Fun times.
So we left late. Then we got lost. I don't even know how we got lost but we were on a dirt road and the sun was fading on the horizon, which to me suggested that this was the direction we had to go in. Only there wasn't a road in that direction. Eventually as the last rays sunk below the wheat fields we stumbled on a sign pointing us to exactly where we needed to go.
Enter camper trailer in the dark erecting. I'm not shy using the word fuck anymore but I didn't say it once putting it up. Not aloud. There was some moving the camper back and forth so we didn't roll off the bed in the middle of the night and eventually after some snapping at each other we settled for "kinda flat" and went with that.
This is how it looked in the morning. We have no idea what we're doing.
Not our best effort and no matter what we did we couldn't figure out how to fix it. To be honest I gave up after about five minutes of Andre's beard stroking.
Other than this hiccup though the weekend was ridiculous! Camping has never been all that relaxing for us, Nate is a constant worry with his absconding and need to do something every five minutes but this time - OH MY GOD. We sat still! He made friends and played, he did what the other kids did, he went on walks and didn't run away, he listened when we asked him to stay close, he helped build a cubby house in the trees. For real! I couldn't believe it.
For a moment in time I felt what it must be like for other people with neuro typical kids. It made me realise that Nate isn't going to be a kid forever, he is growing and changing in ways I had only dreamt of. Some days are still complete poo but the way forward doesn't seem as bleak, it doesn't feel as scary and for the first time in years I've seen that maybe one day Nate will have a life that doesn't involve me constantly monitoring his safety. Just watching him play melted away anxieties I didn't even know I was harbouring.
Normally this is the space where I would put a big photo up of Nate doing all these cute things but apparently I didn't man the camera as well as I thought and the only two photos I even have of him he's covering his face. But he is there, on the beach in photo below. I promise!
|See this pole? I shall hold it and ponder its placement for at least another ten minutes.|
|Jude pretending to be Mia.|
|Photo credit to Keelie!|
|Jude and Ethan became besties. Too cute!|
|Nate's third from the left!|
Another few trips and we'll have this camper thing going on then there will be no stopping us...